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Paris Hilton …reading the Bible, watching "The Secret," and contemplating the meaning of life as the uppity spoiled (Daddy’s money couldn’t buy her out of this butt whipping) one gets ready to do some time in the slammer. DOES ANYBODY REALLY CARE?! I KNOW I DON’T! Moving on…
I WOULD be in the ATL when this happened. I was laughing so hard, I almost had an accident myself. And I knew it was one of two people…my first guess being right on the money! I’m driving around the city and listening to my former co-worker Ryan Cameron on the radio on V103 when he drops this breaking story that happened the night before. Apparently an incident supposedly happened on Spring Street in Atlanta around 12 am. According to a young woman who was involved in a car wreck, it happened when she was going north and pulled into the left turning lane while a known rapper was beside her in the right hand lane. She says she was about to make a left onto North Ave when this rapper tried to turn in front of her truck in an attempt to circle the block to pick up a transvestite.
The victim called Ryan’s afternoon show to tell what happened with the rapper turned preacher turned rapper again and the transvestites. Quotes girlfriend: "The ‘shims’ were running up to the car saying ‘girl, girl we seen what happened we seen everything.’ It’s like five or six of them because they working. So they run up to the car saying ‘girl, are you ok? He’s been circling around here girl like four times already tryin’ to pick one of these queens up’." As well, an undercover cop was on the scene and had seen the whole thing. Apparently not wanting to show his face to the growing crowd after the accident, the rapper stayed in his SUV the whole time…even when the tow truck hauled it off. By the way, the rapper was…former P’Diddy protégé Mase. Hmmm, I wonder if his church congregation is saying "Amen" now to this bad bad boy?!
For all of us who were waiting for that anticipated Lauryn Hill return….doesn’t look like it’s gonna happen anytime soon. One of my girlfriends in California, ’Beri, was in line to become the nanny of Lauryn’s children. Now, of course, the thought of being nanny to Bob Marley’s grandchildren is not only mind-blowing; it’s historic in some way. However, ’Beri just didn’t know if she could accept the drama. Evidently, Lauryn’s mom is handling everything because Lauryn has truly and sadly gone off the deep end…dropping off her 4 children anywhere and walking around, cursing everyone out and acting like she’s some crazy bag lady.
Meantime, Rohan Marley, the children’s father and Lauryn’s "husband" (but let’s forget the fact he was married before and never divorced his first wife) is apparently no where to be found. And this mysterious and weird "spiritual advisor" who Lauryn supposedly left Rohan to be with is still in the picture…and doing her no good. Oh it’s a tangled web…one my friend doesn’t want to get involved in. Can’t blame her. My advice: Run, ’Beri, RUN!!! It ain’t worth it!!! And let us all pray for Lauryn and those children. I remember a wonderful interview I had with her years ago at the beginning of her career. She was such a beautiful person with a beautiful spirit. But this entertainment business and the folks in it can "twist" the minds of the best. Why do you think I chose to leave some "baggage" and "drama" behind?! Ain’t trying to go out like that!
Speaking of crazy, which IS what Robert Kelly is…R. Kelly, facing charges of having sex with an underage girl, compared himself in an interview with Muhammad Ali and Martin Luther King Jr. WHAT?!!! The singer-songwriter made the comparisons during a Hip-Hop Soul magazine interview, saying: "I’m the Ali of today. I’m the Marvin Gaye of today. I’m the Bob Marley of today. I’m the Martin Luther King, or all the other greats that have come before us. And a lot of people are starting to realize that now." Ladies and gentlemen: Let this be a lesson. Not only does cocaine and alcohol abuse kill brain cells; it makes you as delusional as BooBoo the Fool!!
Anyway, moving on to some quickies…
Whitney Houston is being sued by ex-husband Bobby Brown, who is seeking to change his terms of custody with their 14-year-old daughter, Bobbi Kristina. He claims he has been homeless at times since the divorce (YA THINK?!), and is seeking spousal support, as well as child support for their daughter. Yeah, like THAT’S gonna happen with HIS track record.
Word is Juanita Jordan, ex-wife to NBA star Michael Jordan, is dating a man nearly 15 years her junior. Sources say that Juanita and new beau, a 29 year old investment banker from the Chicago branch of Credit Suisse, are getting pretty serious. And the news just keeps getting better for the newly-single Juanita. When her divorce from Michael is finalized in the next few months, Juanita is slated to get close to $200 million in cash and assets. Nothing like having your own banker to help you with your "affairs." Get it? "Affairs?!" Moving on…
Insiders are saying it is now official that Janet Jackson and her sweetie, music mogul Jermaine Dupri, are now engaged and she is sporting a 12-carat ring. Notice I say "insiders" and not my sources…because I STILL refuse to believe this til it actually happens.
Happy Fathers’ Day to all the men who make and have made a difference and who make us daughters (and sons) smile. For more information about the H.U.F. Awards, go to www.hufawards.com.
That’s the latest buzz on the streets. Until next time, happy gossiping…(Val Jones is a writer, poet edutainer, motivational humorist and host of "Jazzitude," Monday nights 7-10pm on 91.9 FM WFSS. Her website is www.iamvaljones.com. )
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